no. no. not.

It seems to come down to one primary theme for most every human I know, or have known. To carve a canyon of self-love in the heart of a shamed inner landscape. Not easy, when those inscripted to build that foundation failed to pass on tools. Not easy, when our ancestry planted seeds of self-hatred in the fields of our consciousness. It takes all that we have, a fertile imagination and a courageous willingness, to forage through the brush to find it. Often we look for it in others, and end up sorely disappointed. Because they can’t do it for us. They just can’t. This is our work, the work of our lives. To learn how to love ourselves, for real. People talk a lot about finding their purpose, without realizing that cultivating self-love IS sacred purpose. It’s the thing that changes everything.

  ~ Jeff Brown


There are these days when I’m on overload….

Too much…

Too many…


I wind up at my breaking point…

I realize I must say ‘no’ to something…

I don’t want to say ‘no’….

others don’t want me to say ‘no’…

everything gets hard…

and harder….

rock hard…


I HAVE to say ‘no’

In response I receive a ‘no. no. not.’…

it feels like a directive….



Suddenly I realize I do not have many boundaries in place…

Maybe never have had very good ones???

a bit of {shock} happens within…

I draw in…
















It’s definitely not a natural thing for me to do…

Feels more than a bit awkward…

I wasn’t taught to have boundaries…

I wasn’t permitted to answer ‘no‘….


I get very silent…



I begin to do research on boundary setting….


I do worksheets…


I do Tapping Sessions….


I do art projects…

I take pictures….

I begin to learn some new things….

it is time I say ‘no’

my need for silence 

drawn from the beauty 

of listening 

to the band playing my song

I find myself on holy ground,

surrounded by glory 

the burning bush

no shoes allowed

I kiss the ground

 these are virtuous moments 

 where I find all the answers to 

my unique ‘yes’



and so I learn…

boundaries (1)

I know it’s a process….

It’s like building a fence…

I feel it shifting….

one small piece at a time….

one slow step in front of each other…




Oh and…
Happy Derby Day!!


One thought on “no. no. not.

  1. The Erich Fromm graphic, solitude and love connection, and so much more.. what an honest glimpse into your journey, and amazing amounts of food for thought.. I think I’ll always be thinking, “thanks for going to all the trouble”.. though I imagine or know that word ‘trouble’ is out of place.. so much here that resonates.. you know, I don’t think NO and STOP ever felt so good.
    ~ m.e.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s