the feels

 

Easter happens…

[ it doesn’t feel* like Easter ]

                        It was a good day overall…

though I feel a bit rejected *

my paisley tie feels a bit askew**

like the rest of me….

like I belong to no one….

….I long for a chocolate Easter Bunny* half way through the day…

….maybe that would satisfy my sensory need to feel holiday-ish

I am denied….every store I try is closed*….

               * tears happen a few times
over the weekend and again
even as I write
and every time I read this throughout the week
{the storm may come at any minute}

**great blog-worthy word suggestion by Sue Timony-Hall

 

All weekend I walk with the pressure of creative ‘deadline’…..

I try to ‘force’ the creative process….

{there can be no wine before it’s time….

there is no force strong enough to birth before it’s time}

April the giraffe gave us a lesson on that these past months….

{

 

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Congratulations!!!

}

I consciously release my shoulders from up around my ears…

—- I keep doing that —-

just breath…

breathe….

>>> I keep doing that >>>

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I think about…

how to eat any elephant….

the answer is always:

ONE BITE AT A TIME

I LET GO….repeat….repeat….

create

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I consciously release my shoulders from up around my ears…

—- I keep doing that —-

breathe….

just breath…

>>> I Keep doing that >>>

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I begin to do what has to be done…

first…

second….

you get it….

it’s only numbers…

numbers

Facebook                            Leaves by Fisherman Dan/Branford, CT

A question on the longevity of a budding music project prompts a song lyric reflection of my vision of the road…

Do you know how long this road? 
He cocked his head and asked,
I’ve been to SanTiago – 500 miles gone past
Now I sit here wondering 
how long this trip will last
another trip around the sun 
I got here pretty fast

Then she said,
Im a long road girl
I don’t count no miles
I’m a long road girl
I just count the smiles
Of all the people
Everyday
Of all the friends
Along the way
That’s all that matters
Matters too
A long road girl
Longing for a view

Do you want to sing a while? 
He bowed his head and asked,
I’ve found a tune for playing – a thousand more come fast
I’ve written you a song or two – 
that’s how our miles will pass
another trip around the sun 
The flower will bloom at last
Then she said,
Im a long road girl
I just sing my songs
I’m a long road girl
won’t you sing along
to all our people
Everyday
To all our friends
Along the way
That’s all that matters
Matters too
A long road girl
In love with you

Starshine to stardust
oceans to earth 
Songshine to songburst
Filling the sky
Roaddogs to roadmaps
Pathways are paved
Free-falls to freebirds
see how we fly

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someone tells me that this Easter was their best in 63 years*!!!!

they explained how resurrection matters for them today…

…in this moment…

They’ve never understood it before…

this year….

the same day I couldn’t feel it…

they felt it for the first time!!!!!!    ❤

My heart bows and rejoices!

I LOVE THAT
TO INFINITY AND BEYOND!!!!

 

And…
on a this very day with Spring literally bursting with joy right outside my window….
and birds singing at the top of their lungs…
the cool-warm air coming in through the open window…
all day long…
I realize the meaning of the shirt I chose to wear this morning has shifted for me….
Someday is today…
it makes perfect sense….
not everything is for me…
                …and that’s ok….
life….love…it’s all giving birth around me…
I get to see it every minute!
and as I take a short break
and breathe again…
(in between projects…) 
the clouds call me to come take a walk…
calling me into the invisible…
the mystic…
the mystery….
and, as I count all these blessings…
I recognize the beauty….
this life I inhabit…
all these wild and precious threads I am so fortunate to hold
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 Come Monday…
guess what was waiting for me AND was 50% off???
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One thought on “the feels

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